Friday, June 27, 2008


A message every adult should read because children
are watching you and doing as you do, not as you say.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you hang my
first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately
wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feed a
stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind
to animals.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make my
favorite cake for me, and I learned that the little
things can be the special things in life.

When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a
prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could always
talk to, and I learned to trust in Him.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make a
meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I
learned that we all have to help take care of each

When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you give of
your time and money to help people who had nothing,
and I learned that those who have something should
give to those who don't.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you take care
of our house and everyone in it, and I learned we have
to take care of what we are given.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw how you
handled your responsibilities, even when you didn' t
feel good, and I learned that I would have to be
responsible when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come
from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things
hurt, but it's all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you
cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of
life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and
productive person when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and
wanted to say,'Thanks for all the things I saw when
you thought I wasn't looking.'

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Just a quick howdy doody to one and all. Hope all of you are well and happy. I am doing nothing but being lazy this summer and I LOVE IT. With gas costing so much we just don't go anywhere since both of us are unemployed until school starts. Unlike some eastern school teachers we don't get a high pay to carry us through the summer. By the way Foam I liked the classical music you had on your blog. Frequently I enjoy listening to that kind of music although I prefer full orchestras.

Have a nice day everyone.

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah ..
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in
£20, even though it's only for £32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

A man will pay
$2 for a 1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a 2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from M&S.
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the bins,
answer the phone, read a book, and get the post.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children.
She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

A married man should forget his mistakes.
There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

OK Pam, can you identify this bird? I called it a spinner.

Here is something for most women to consider. Someday you will be a mother-in-law. Maybe you are a mother-in-law. Perhaps you will or do have sons who have a mother-in-law. Consider the following carefully.

An old woman has three daughters. One day she decided to test her sons-in-law. She was walking alone at a lake shore with the first son-in law. Purposefully, she fell in the lake and started yelling for help. The first son-in-law jumped in the lake and dragged her to shore. The very next day he found a brand new Ford Focus in his driveway with the words "Thank you, your mother-in-law loves you very much."

Another day she was walking along the lake shore with the second son-in-law. Purposefully, she fell down the lake and started yelling for help. The second son-in-law jumped into the water and dragged her to shore. The very next day he found a brand new Pontiac Sunfire in his driveway with the words, "Thank you, your mother-in-law loves you very much."

The third day she was walking with the third son-in-law and repeated the test, but that guy didn't respond to her cries for help and didn't make a single move to save her. The poor old lady who wanted to test her sons-in-law drowned and died. The next day he found a brand new Mercedes convertible in his driveway with the words, "Thank you very much! Your father- in-law."

Have a nice day everyone.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Oh to be young again. I used to hike up mountains just to ski down them.

My wife and I are at it again. I think we need a divorce counselor. She got all upset with me because when she went to use the bathroom I yelled out, "Turn off the light, the gas will ignite and the house will blow up!" Now what is wrong with that?

My wife is mean and cruel. I am a poor, humble, crippled, pleasantly fat person who is regulated in what he should be doing physically. Does that bother her? Oh, no!!! For the past few days, (thank God for Sunday), she has had me shoveling, planting, watering, spraying, and all other manner of thoughtless work items instead of letting me be like Dagwood Bumstead and enjoy resting.

She claims that my garage is a disaster. Now what right does any woman have to claim the one and only space that a poor man has, that he can claim his own, is a disaster? It might be a little junky, maybe a little dirty but it is organized confusion. Maybe if the little woman would take all her stuff out of the garage (the man's domain) he might be able to move about and enjoy it more.

Did I mention we went camping? All the time there it was, "Get out there you lazy lout and catch me some fish." She don't even like fish. I think she was trying to get rid of me. I had to kneel down and beg her to let me stay in the camper and rest.

I had a poem I was going to write but now I can't think of it. It would have been an original and probably a masterpiece. I could tell the story sent to me by Alice P in Canada but the ending was not a pleasant one and I would be afraid someone might get the wrong idea. What she proclaimed doing to a poor little mosquito was just not right.

Have a nice day everyone.

PS Spraying yourself with Listerine does keep the mosquitoes off.

Friday, June 13, 2008


OPEC sells oil for $136.00 a barrel.
OPEC nations buy U.S. grain at $7.00 a bushel.
Solution: Sell grain for $136.00 a bushel.
Can't buy it? Tough! Eat your oil!
Ought to go well with a nice thick grilled filet of camel ass!!!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Now I am not a drinking man but sometimes this makes sense.

I am in a LOT of pain today so will be very short. Cheryl and I just got back from her heart stress test and we are both worn out. It has been a long day.

Now for anyone who might be a school teacher I was sent the following from one of my nieces. Enjoy!!

'Late again,' the third-grade teacher said to little Sammy.
'It ain't my fault this time, Miss Crabtree. You can blame this'un on my Daddy. The reason I'm three hours late is my Daddy sleeps naked!'
Now Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years.
Despite her mounting fears, she asked little Sammy what he meant by that.
Full of grins and mischief, and in the flower of his youth, little Sammy and trouble were old friends, but he always told her the truth. 'You see, Miss Crabtree, out at the ranch we got this here low down coyote. The last few nights he done et six hens and killed Ma's best milk goat. Last night, when Daddy heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his shot gun and said to Ma 'That coyote's back again, I'm a gonna git him!''
'Stay back,' he whispered to all us kids.
He was naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt! To the hen house he crawled, just like an Injun on the snoop. Then he stuck that double barreled 12-gauge shot gun through the window of the coop. As he stared into the darkness, with coyotes on his mind, our old
hound dog Zeke had done woke up and comes sneakin' up behind Daddy.
Then as we all looked on plumb helpless ; old Zeke stuck his cold nose in Daddy's butt crack!
'Miss Crabtree, we all been cleanin' chickens since three o'clock this mornin'!'

Oh yeah.

Have a nice day everyone.

Monday, June 09, 2008

Cheryl says this picture is her and I. Now I never considered myself to be a moose and I certainly would not call Cheryl one... a bear maybe but not a moose.`

Our trips are over and we are both still recovering. Cheryl's trek was a lot of fun, very wet, a little cool, and provided more than it's share of blistered feet. Instead of the porta-potty she rode in the covered wagon and helped drive the horses. Oh yeah, I can just see her driving a team of very large horses, especially knowing she is afraid of horses a little bit. She did more than her share of walking which upset me greatly, although I didn't say much, because she enjoyed it so. Prior to this trek the doctor had explicitly told her not to be walking due to her heart condition, but like most women she didn't listen.

My trip was quite enjoyable also. I took students from three different high schools to Moscow, ID for an FFA convention. (Pam is that very close to where you live?) It rained all the time we were there and all the way back home. The first day some of the kids went river rafting and the rapids were quite high which brought many a squeal both of delight and fear. We were following in the bus and watching, plus being a little envious that I couldn't be out there with them. The cost was $40.00 per person so not too many could come up with that kind of money. We also visited Dworshak dam which was kind of interesting.

The drive up was very tiring but the drive back was a killer. The advisor's didn't want to stop for hardly anything and it is a solid 11 hour drive with some interesting hills, passes, winding roads and etc. Whine, whine, whine. Needless to say I was VERY tired when I got home that morning.

I just read Pam's blog about childhood memories. Loved it. Tonight we are having a group of people over and that is what we are going to talk about so Pam couldn't have posted a better blog at a better time. Some of my childhood memories are:
1. Fresh bread or rolls
2. Barnyard smells (I don't know if that is a good memory though.:))
3. Water running in a creek bed nice and clear and tasty.
4. The smell of the horse, the creak of the saddle, the freshness of the morning.
5. Music. Playing my trumpet in band, orchestra, pep band, dance band.
6. Shooting my old 22 rifle and becoming a pretty fair shot.
7. Riding or climbing in the mountains to see what I could see.
8. The smell of pine wood burning in a camp fire.
9. Laying out on the lawn at night and watching the stars. Wondering if aliens were coming to get me. (Invaders From Mars scared the by gollys out of me.)
10. Thanksgiving when all the relatives from my father's side would gather for the meal.

OK, OK, enough of this prattle. By the way Foam old bud, are those pictures on your blog self portraits or what? MERCY WOMAN!!! (I liked them)

My driving days are through for a couple of months so maybe I can get some things done that have been neglected. I kept hoping that lazy Cheryl would get out there and do my work but she didn't see it that way. I'm just kidding about her being lazy. We both know who the lazy one is in this household and it isn't her. The cat and dog are both dead so they can't be blamed for anything. That leaves just me. Oh well, guess I'll go eat worms.

Have a nice day everyone.