Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Brilliance Eludes Me At Times

I have to admit there are times when I am not so brilliant. For the life of me I cannot figure out how to put a picture in my profile. I also get some very funny emails with animated pictures that I would love to use with my blogs but I cannot get them to attach. If someone would like to help a poor, senile, old man I would appreciate it and when I find a poor, senile, old man I will pass it on to him. Some of you guys do very neat things with your blogs and it makes me jealous. I think it is Sunshine that has the videos and they are awesome.

We went up to our daughters house yesterday so Cheryl and she could prepare for their community education class they teach. While there we found out that one of the dogs had bitten their boy and of course everyone was greatly concerned why. Come to find out the boy had hit the dog with a stick that had nails in it and the dog was just protecting himself. Three year olds, ya just gotta love them. Of course their dogs are dobermans so there was a need for concern although this particular dog is a whimp.

It reminded me of when I first joined the family that adopted me. I was about 4 or 41/2 years old at the time and for some reason I could never get enough to eat. This family did not know about dog food that you could buy, it was table scraps or nothing, so when the girls would not finish their meals out to the dog it went. Since I could not get enough to eat guess who else went out to the dog dish to eat? Yep, and the dog was not happy with me. This went on for a few days and the dog decided enough was enough.

I was out there one morning enjoying a meal, in the dog dish, of half eaten eggs, half eaten mush (that is what we would call cooked cereal) when the dog decided to take matters into its own paws. His name was Tip. Old Tip came over to me, while I was enjoying my thoroughfare, reached down and grabbed me by the collar of my shirt. He proceeded to drag me about 20 feet or so, plopped me down and went back to his dish as if to say, "This is mine. Don't let me catch you in it again." Needless to say I did not attempt to bother old Tip's food anymore.

I have enjoyed several dogs in my life but it took the last one to make me appreciate having a dog for a friend. On the farm dogs were just a part of life like cows, horses, pigs (well they could be left out) and all the other animals. It was 16 years ago we received a little lap dog that we named Dusty and he was with us up 'til the time we had to put him to sleep. He was so much fun and at times a great pain in the southerly end. He was the one who actually picked out the kitten we wanted and they were the best of friends. Now the kitten is a 20 pound fatso and believe it or not he really misses Dusty.

I have got to get my wife to tell me stories of her past. I keep telling her she needs to do some rebuttals but she trusts me, heh heh heh, the silly woman. My wife is an extremely neat person and I know she would not be as boring as I am. I might even tell stories about some of my relatives but, heaven help us all, I don't know if I can print such horrible items. (Nila) (Janet) (Ron) (Matt) Mercy, it scares me to think of it. I get nervous talking about our friend Amber whom we have not heard from for a while. Have there been any UFO sightings around the Denver area lately? Maybe she went home for a visit.

Lara if you still read these silly things of mine I hope you are forgiving of my grammar and spelling. As a professional it must grate a little to see someone write so poorly.

A question: If a man is called a stud what is his wife called? A studette?

Got to stop. Breakfast is calling and it is in no dog dish this morning, yet. Below is a picture of our Dusty.

Monday, January 30, 2006

Good Monday Morning

I was going to post another picture but blogger won't let me. I guess someone must have edited my "Bra" post. I am glad so many of you enjoyed it. Yes, my sense of humour does get me into trouble at times.

Well, my wife accomplished something yesterday that I did not think would ever be accomplished; she taught me how to make hats from yarn. Now am I boring or what? Actually she has been going to the prison and teaching the prisoners, both men and women, how to do this and they have really enjoyed it. I guess when you set around all day with nothing to do but stare at the four walls, other prisoners, or the TV, which stinks, you are willing to try anything. Last Saturday she had about 15 men and 10 women making hats and booties for humanitarian purposes. The men liked it so much they begged her to come back the following week.

So last night as I was watching Law and Order Criminal Intent, and Crossing Jordan I asked her to show me what they were doing. Now I have a hat coming along quite nicely. Okay, okay I can already hear the giggling coming from some of you who know me quite well. Just stop it! I am not a sissy and just because I moved from California I am not strange either.

We had our daughter Kimberly and her family over for dinner last night. The reason I mention this is because even though they eat here quite often and visit quite often we had never "officially" invited them for dinner. So we got out the good china, fixed up the table nice and neat and even lit a candle to place in the center of the table; all this just for them. Cheryl made some of the most delicious chicken, mashed potatoes, gravy, green peas, corn bread and topped it off with peach cobler. Now if this is how one is to get a great meal then maybe I should invite someone over more often.

Got a call from our realtor and the offer we made on the house has been accepted now we just go through all the hooplaa for the next steps. We are nothing but a bundle of nerves. We don't want to say anything to our friends and our church until we know it is definitely a done deal and that is killing us. Well, it is killing Cheryl anyway, she just wants to start doing things so badly.

I guess that is all for today. I think of stories to tell and then forget them; senior moments they call it. Have a nice day.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Having a hard time getting the brain to think this morning. I know, why should it be any different than other mornings. For some reason I could just feel several relatives and friends thinking that.

I hope the following does not offend anyone. It is just my sense of humour.

What Religion is Your Bra?

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife".

"What type of bra?" asked the clerk?

"Type?" inquires the man, "There's more than one type"?

"Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable. "Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types! of bras to choose from".

Relieved, the man asked about the types.

The saleslady replied: "There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer"?

Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them.

The Saleslady responded, "It is all really quite simple...

The Catholic type supports the masses

The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen,

The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright,

The Baptist makes mountains out of mole hills.

Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed!

(A) Almost Boobs

(B) Barely there.

(C) Can't Complain!

(D) Dang!

(DD) Double dang!

(E) Enormous!

(F) Fake.

(G) Get a Reduction.

(H) Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up !

Don't forgot the German bra. Holtzemfromfloppen!

Have a nice day everyone.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Glacier National Park

Hello to everyone again. As you can tell from the above picture the pioneers had their travel problems as well.

For some strange reason I have had a tune going through my head since I read a certain blog yesterday. It goes like this: "The Tennessee stud (er is that the Washington stud) is long and lean, the color of the sun and his eyes are green." It escapes me as to why I would think of this but I did. :)

I was thinking of a trip that Cheryl and I took to Glacier Park in Montana. If you have never been there you should try and go it is simply beautiful. We drove to the town of Riggins, Idaho and left the kids with some of our very good friends then proceeded across Idaho via the Clearwater River country. Again the scenery is breathtaking. As we approached Glacier Park we looked at the map and decided we would take this particular route so we could then go into Canada. This meant we had to travel the highway to the sun. (I think that is the name) Now this particular highway was created back in the olden days by Chinese laborers who were dropped over the side of a mountain and they chipped our the road. (Again, I hope I am remembering this correctly) Needless to say the road is still quite narrow and goes very high.

I think I have mentioned before that I have a fear of heights. Well, we started up from the bottom and all was well. I was extremely nervous due to the narrow road, the size of our pickup and camper and all the traffic on the road, some of which were much bigger than me. Naturally we had the side that was along the edge and, according to me, if your car was to go off the road you would fall straight down until you hit the road below you. No side barriers, oh no, just stones that would not stop a large deer.

I was doing fine through the first couple of switchback, looking straight ahead so I would not suffer a panic attack from looking down, when what should my lovely wife sau? "Oh wow, look at that view!" She pointed to her right and I looked; stupid me. I was looking at nothing but blue sky above me, blue sky to the right of me and I swear on my wife's grave there was blue sky below me. I froze right there in the middle of the road. There were no pull outs, the road was soooooo narrow and cars were zooming past and around me which added to my panic attack.

I finally got my composure and we seen a small, and I do mean small, place I could back down to and settle my nerves. Cheryl guided me and I thought I had taken all the space I could possible take before plunging to what I knew was a sure death. As we were sitting there, and Cheryl kept insulting me by asking if she could drive the rest of the way to the top, what should happen but a California car (naturally) zoomed up behind us. They managed to get that car between our vehicle and the edge and out jumped an "old" man. He jumped up on the stone that was keeping me from certain death, looked straight down and made the comment, "Wow, that is a heck of a view!" My heart stopped for at least 10 minutes I know it did.

Another thirty minutes went by before I could regain my composure enough to just get in the pickup let alone drive. Needless to say I got up enough courage to make it to the top. I was hugging the middle of the road so hard that I was getting blessings from the other drivers for being so safety minded. I guess they were blessings for I sure heard the word "God" a lot.

Once on top I could not bring myself to look back down the canyon. I was so shook up. It was simply beautiful country though and I am now glad I went. Some day I would like to go again to see if it affects me that way now.

The rest of the trip we had a great time. Camped in Canada, seen the town of Frank which was buried by a mountain and then back into Idaho via Sandpoint and back to Riggins. I hear that Canada requires passports now so I guess it will be a while before I go there again. Too bad because it is beautiful in the western part.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

The Day I Almost Died

I have not told a story for some time now and during the night it came to me to tell of the time I almost died, although most of my children were there at the time. This way they can tell their children the story.

I have always had high blood pressure. I cannot remember, even when I was young, when it was not abnormaly high. Normal for me seems to be in the range of 155/95. The doctors have stressed out and done a mirage of things to correct the issue; even suggesting losing weight which has been a losing battle. At my lowest weight of 175 and in excellent shape it was still high. Okay, I think everyone understands now I have high blood pressure.

While living in California one doctor was determined to win the battle so out came the pill bottles and the experiments began. I actually got down to 14?/8?. He gave me two pills, and to this day I don't remember what, that seemed to have a bad reaction and when I told him about the reaction he just sluffed it off. It was my own fault for what happened to me and I learned a valuable lesson from it. I had to go for a checkup and, being the stubborn Irishman I am, I decided to take those two pills one more time to show him how bad it got.

He checked me out and made his usual comment of it being high and asked me if I wanted to stay and have it monitored for a while or go home. What normal person wants to stay in a doctors office; I naturally elected to go home.

On the way home I really started feeling rough. It was hard to sit up (thank goodness Cheryl was driving) and it was even hard to lay down; I was miserable. We pulled up to the garage and I attempted to walk into the house but could make it no further than the other end of the garage. I literally got down on my hands and knees and crawled back to our bedroom. Cheryl, of course, was starting to freak out. She had to help me get onto the bed. At that point she called the ambulance and made the decision to take me to the emergency room.

I was literally starting to black out by the time the ambulance arrived. The paramedics looked at our hallway, which was kind of small, and wondered how they were going to get me on the gurney and down the hall. They asked me if I could somehow get down to where there was more room. Now I must deviate from my story just a bit at this point.

We had a small dog named Dusty who was going nuts about strangers in the house and what they were doing to me. Cheryl decided to put him in the spare room where his barking would not be so distractive. At that point I started crawling down the hallway on my hands and knees and it was extremely difficult. Now, the only name the paramedics had heard during all this was Dusty's name and so assumed that was my name. One of them kept encouraging me by saying, "Come on Dusty, you can make it." By the time I finally made it to the gurney I was cognizant enough to still have my sense of humour. As I struggled to get on the gurney, again he said, "Come on Dusty, you can make it." At this point I looked up at him and went, "Woof, woof", and they had the most puzzled looks on their faces. Cheryl then told them that Dusty was the dog and my name was Tim. At least they found some humour in the situation at that point.

To the hospital I went and rushed into the ER where they found my blood pressure had dropped from 22?/18? (no, I am not lying) to 50/2? and I was shutting down. My kidneys had stopped functioning and they hurt like they have never hurt. My breathing was extremely shallow and quite frankly if it hadn't have been for the pain from my kidneys I might have just succumbed to the darkness that was surrounding me.

Shots of this, IV's of that and a lot of stuff took place. They ran a tube down my little feller so I could void my fluids and even then it hurt soooooo bad. Of course they had to have the cutest nurse on duty take care of that part. No man wants that. I vaguely remember my children coming in to see me and they were all crying. My son, Michael, left because he couldn't handle it. Cheryl was in such a state. Me, I was just the cause of everything so I am telling what they told me later.

I remember having two elders from my church come in and give me a blessing. Immediately after they left my bedside I voided everything that was in my system and I started regaining my strength back. Still a lot of pain until my kidneys started working like they should, but within 24 hours I was back to being my usual obnoxious self and making everyone suffer from my weird sense of humour.

So that is the story of the day I almost bought the farm. When I returned to church everyone was asking me how I was doing and I just told them that resurrection is not all it is cut out to be. They were still as ugly as I remembered them. (I am such a nice guy)

Enough of my blarney for today.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

What to Say Today?

Oh what I would give (maybe) to be 40 again. My body would be in much better shape. I would feel like I have some energy and I would hopefully be smarter than I was at that age. As we tackle the problem of boxing things for moving, the problems of taking things down, loading them and all the stuff associated with it, I find I have no stamina.

I was thinking the other day, (yes, I do THINK once in a while) about how I communicate with others. If I were to say I go to a STAKE house rather than to a STEAK house there would be many who could associate with me and know exactly what I am talking about. If someone would say to me, "Are you an elder?", I would say back, "No, I am a high priest." Many around us would think we were talking a foreign language.

I am not one to push religion on anyone but I am pleased and proud of the fact that I am LDS. My religion is my life and without it I would be so lost. I am a former temple worker having worked in both the Los Angeles and Idaho Falls temples. Some of you who read these writings of mine might wonder what in the heck is he talking about while others will say they knew it by my speech.

What in the world am I talking about? I am always on the lookout for other LDS people 'cause we all share a common bond and I find it very neat to find others around the world. It creates a bond that only those associated could appreciate. What does that mean to anyone who is not LDS? It means you should check it out and see what is so neat about the whole thing.

Cheryl thought I should tell about my truck wreck by Jerome, Idaho but I will tell that another day. Lately I have been so caught up with the situation we are in here at home that my mind has had trouble focusing on what I would like to say. I really do have a sense of humour even though at times it is hard to find.

I find myself envying those of you who write so well. I appreciate those of you who have had an education 'cause it shows. Me, I am just an old truck driver who has struggled to get by in life and now in old age I am paying the price for being an uneducated man. Please keep writing in your blogs for through your writings I educate myself with your words and thoughts. The lady from Missouri does such a great job.

Oh, before I forget, I am NOT a BYU fan. Maybe at one time when LaVelle Edwards was there but not since. Now I am a Utah State Aggie fan come win or lose. I will never be anything but a BRONCOS fan no matter how fortunate Pittsburg was this past Sunday. Of course being a very religious man I didn't watch the game, it being the sabbath and all, I just kept checking the score every 30 seconds or so. :)

Monday, January 23, 2006

How Old Is Grandma?

I received this from a friend in Idaho and thought it was too good to pass by. Hope you enjoy it.

How old is Grandma???
Stay with this -- the answer is at the end. It will blow you away.

One evening a grandson was talking to his grandmother about current events. The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.

The Grandma replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before:
'polio shots
'frozen foods
'contact lenses
'the pill

There were no:
'credit cards
'laser beams
'ball-point pens

Man had not invented:
'air conditioners
'clothes dryers
'the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air
'man hadn't yet walked on the moon

Your Grandfather and I got married first. . .. and then lived together. Every family had a father and a mother.

Until I was 25, I called every man older than me, "Sir". And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir."

We were before gay-rights, computer- dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy.

Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.

We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.

Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege.

We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.

Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.

Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started.

Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends-not purchasing condominiums.

We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.

We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.

If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan ' on it, it was junk.

The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam.

Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.

We had 5 &10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.

Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.

You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, . . . but who could afford one? Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.

In my day:
"grass" was mowed,
"coke" was a cold drink,
"pot" was something your mother cooked in
"rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby.
"Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office,
" chip" meant a piece of wood,
"hardware" was found in a hardware store
"software" wasn't even a word.

We were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby. No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap...

How old do you think I am?

This Woman would be only 58 years old!

That is my story...

We all get heavier as we get older because there's a lot more information in our heads. So I'm not fat, I'm just really intelligent and my head couldn't hold any more so it started filling up the rest of me! That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Oh, I have to eat a lot of crow this morning. Did the Broncos let me down or what? I have received phone calls with laughing voices on the other end, I have received e-mails and could feel the snickers but to top it all of Hollyberry will never let me forget who won yesterday.

My daughter Katherine just could not wait to call me and let me know the game was over and the Steelers had won. The humiliation of it all.

Today we find out if our offer on a house was accepted. Cheryl and I are kind of on pins and needles about the whole thing. She is so nervous that she is picking on me and that is not acceptable; I do the picking around here.

Prison was quite mellow yesterday. Starting to get a new bunch but the same old reasons; drugs (as a rule). I just don't understand the drug thing I guess. What would make a person get so low as to want to put that stuff in their system? Meth, in my opinion, is one of the most dangerous of all drugs due to the long time effects on the brain. I have seen people in there that it is so obvious their brains are fried; half the time they don't know what they are even talking about.

I guess I should be thankful that the only problem in my day was alcohol which is a drug also. I often wonder what I would have done had the stuff that is available today would have been available back then. (You know, the horse and buggy days.) I actually feel sorry for the ones who are hooked on this stuff 'cause their lives are no longer theirs.

Enough of that. It is actually a good day. Cheryl is going to work and the cat and I will take our naps then tell her how busy we were. Have a nice day everyone.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

My form of relaxation in the evening is watching a movie or a television show. Of course I like Harry Potter, Star Wars, The Thirteenth Warrior, Zorro, any John Wayne move and I really like the Robert Redford movie Jeremiah Johnson. Television is usually the CSI shows, all of them, Crossing Jordan, Ghost Whisperer and certainly Lost. Cheryl and I got hooked on Dancing With The Stars last summer and have enjoyed it this season as well. However, it is so apparent that something is wrong there. They have eliminated some of the better dancers and kept that stupid P Diddle, or whatever his name is, who cannot dance to save his life. He is an embarrassment to the rest of the group yet he has a strong enough call in vote to keep him on the show; what a joke. I was glad they eliminated Tatum O'Neal; she is one spoiled individual and I felt sorry for her partner. (How did I get on this tirade?)

Now more about ME, ME, ME!!!

Well, that was enough about me.

Not much happening with our lives right now. I just keep on blogging and Cheryl keeps on doing her thing. There is one thing that my wife and I do that I really enjoy, (no, it is not just sex). It is the little things that keep fond feelings in our marriage. We hold hands when watching TV, we always give one another a kiss in the morning and at night and tell each other how much we love them. At times we will just lay in bed and hold hands or snuggle up and talk about things that we are involved with. If I am in the computer room doing my thing Cheryl will come in and work on her sewing or whatever project she is doing. Why? She says it is because she likes being around me. I tell her that is right buddy girl and she is not to forget it. Now after 40 years of marriage that is a real compliment. I guess I will keep her for a while longer.

Hope this finds everyone happy and healthy. Nothing worse than getting up every morning and dreading the day for whatever reason. As a kid I just dreaded hearing the car pull into the drive knowing that the adults were home and the tension would be mounting. With Cheryl I love to hear the car pull in. It means I get fed!! Seriously, it means that my best friend is home and the happiness will continue. I don't know what I would do if I lost her.

Okay, okay enough of this stuff. Someone might start thinking I am a big softy.

Friday, January 20, 2006

House Hunting

As I have mentioned before we have been house hunting and this one caught our eye. We did not get to go inside so I don't know what condition the rooms were in. I think we will pass this one by.

The one on the right was very interesting but for some reason we just could not find ourselves living in it. Yes, that is a mural on the end of the house making it look like you are seeing the inside of it. Kind of neat in a way though.

The view from the one on the left was spectacular, however it scared the dickens out of me. I have a horrible fear of heights even though I can fly an airplane without any problem.

The one in the middle would have been the talk of the family but it was just too wierd for me.

This house was just too small plus one wrong step and it would be all over for you. Great view though

The one on the right was our favorite but the chimney needs some work done on it. Looks like it went through a tornado or something. Either that or the workers were really feeling high that particular day.

Anyway you can see that house hunting has its quirks. All of these pictures were courtesy of my friend Jason in Idaho Falls, Idaho. I thought they made for good blog material today.

We were talking to our son Kip last night and somehow the stories about him on my blog came up. The grandkids like them, Kip didn't think they were funny so I will have to tell some funny stories about him.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Now this picture might say it all. Men just need to be calm and let things go as they may.

I had a rough night sleeping which means the brain is not functioning too well this morning. We had a major snowstorm come through yesterday and are expecting more today. Sure glad I have a four wheel drive vehicle even if it is as old as dirt.

I have been trying to think of something witty and uplifting but the mind keeps coming up blank. I did do one of the things I listed on my previous blog; I wrote my congressman and voiced my concerns about this Medicare fiasco. I have never done that before and it will be interesting to see if any answer comes back. I realize it will be an aide that does the answering but what the heck, I tried.

Was hoping I would get to go to Cabelas this weekend but with the storms it does not look like it will happen. Cheryl gave me a gift certificate and I need a new fishing pole, or two.

Have a nice day.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

My List of Things To Do

I realize that Thanksgiving has come and gone but when I found this picture it was too good to pass up, especially since the playoffs are here.

I have noticed that there is a thing (can't think of a better word right now) going on a few blogs of listing items about ones self or whatever. Boy my english is really clicking today. Anyway, I thought today I would list the 32 things I would like to do before I die or get too old to do anything. The order is not necessarily the order to them in.

  1. Take a ride in a jet fighter.
  2. Fly a glider.
  3. Catch a fish that is over 25 lbs.
  4. Have a boat that I can take everywhere.
  5. Take Cheryl on an Alaskan cruise.
  6. Take Cheryl on the Denali train trip.
  7. Catch a king salmon.
  8. Have all my children and their spouses join me in the temple.
  9. Visit the northeastern states in the fall time.
  10. Visit the Civil War sites.
  11. Take all my children and their spouses on a vacation to Alaska.
  12. Do a lot more camping with Cheryl.
  13. Go for a hot air balloon ride with my daughter.
  14. Ride the Silverton-Durango train.
  15. Ride the Heber Creeper at Halloween time.
  16. Write a letter to my congressman and voice my opinion.
  17. Raise another nice garden. (The last ones have been disasters)
  18. Find my great grandfather in Brooklyn. (Genealogy)
  19. Be sure and tell my wife how much I love her each day.
  20. Go fishing more.
  21. Go to Ireland and Scotland.
  22. Have an area in my home for me to put up a train display.
  23. Have a nice work area in my home. (LARGE ONE)
  24. Take a class on small engine repair.
  25. Become an accredited genealogist.
  26. Sing a solo without making a fool of myself.
  27. Plant a money tree.
  28. Harvest the money tree.
  29. Quit moving so much. (Even I get tired of seeing what is over the next hill sometimes)
  30. Lose some weight. (Not going to happen so I don't know why I mention it)
  31. Stay my handsome, articulate, loveable self. :):):)
  32. Be a good person to all around me.
  33. Give Cheryl some time off from her duties and responsibilities. (Between mid-night and 3:00 am. ought to do it)
  34. Be a good blogger and encourage others to do it also.
  35. My wife says this is a good place to end so I will.

Hope you enjoy this sillyness. (Is that a word?) Oh, oh, oh and last but certainly not least...


Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Another of "My" Accidents

Well, we found out that we have to move no matter what circumstances we live in right now. We just found out recently that a female named "Amber" might be headed this way in February and would like to come and see us. Heaven help me we need to be gone so she cannot find us. One cannot begin to imagine the stress it would cause on me. I might snap and go join a cult or something for protection from the alien species.

Actually we love Amber. She has been a good friend to our daughter and to us. She would feel like we did not like her if I treated her any other way.

Matt, the offer you made to Cheryl, if you are serious we might take you up on it so let us know the terms and so forth.

I have been thinking of Kip a lot lately. Since I told a little of his life story, the accidents anyway, I have been doing some thinking about some of my accidents. Maybe Kip comes by his disasters quite naturally.

When I was entering my junior year in high school I was eagerly awaiting the opening day of football practice because I felt I had a good chance to make the starting team. Before that day came I was helping an old gentleman bring in his hay for the season as I had done for the previous 2 years. He and his wife treated me like I was one of their own family and I truly loved them. Haying season for him was about 6 weeks long since it was swamp hay and a lot of it. This particular year (my junior year) it had been an incredible hard year getting things done. By the time the last bale was placed in the stack we were all happy as could be to see it come to an end. My cousin and I were bringing in some of the equipment from the field to the house area and we were both on a Farmall C tractor. (I hope the spelling is correct)

My cousin was driving and I was standing on the drawbar behind him. This drawbar had been greased so it could pull equipment and not have too much friction or wear or tear. Naturally I got grease on the bottom of my shoes and my feet were quite slippery. I crawled up on the axle of the tractor to talk to my cousin and was hanging on to the light bar. This particular style of tractor did not have fenders to protect you from the wheel so you had to be careful not to get hit by the wheel as you were traveling. To country boys this was old stuff and we had done it most of our lives.

My cousin had the tractor going as fast as we could get it to go. Suddenly it hit a pothole in the road causing me to lose my balance and the wheel hit me and knocked me off. Unfortunately it knocked me frontwise which meant I hit the ground right in front of the oncoming wheel. I instinctively rolled out of the way but my feet was caught on the axle and I was in an inverted position; face down and my feet and legs bending backwards in a very unnatural position. That day I was glad not only for my instincts and quickness, but my cousin was equally quick and instinctive.

If you have ever watched someone draw a bow back as they prepare to shoot an arrow you might have wondered if they ever went too far and broke the bow from too much pull. That is the way my back was that day. How my cousin got that tractor stopped before my back snapped is still a mystery to me. I do remember that all I could say, and quite loudly too, was get this @#$%^&*(!! tractor off of me. When all was said and done, and I went to the hospital for a few days, the most damage was just from unnatural stretching and the hide had been taken off my rib cage where the wheel had hit me. Needless to say I missed football that year because I was sore for a long, long time. I still think the worst part of the whole ordeal was the nurse taking alcohol and cleaning out the gravel from my side; now that did not feel good.

So Josey if you read this maybe some of your problems are genetic. :) Guess that is all for today. Hollyberry, I know Pittsburg won, but this weekend it will end for them and they will go home crying. :)

Monday, January 16, 2006

Nothing Special Today

I received this picture from someone, I am sorry I don't remember who, but thought it was too good to pass up. Sometimes this is how we feel when we go to the prison. We found out yesterday that some of the federal prisoners have formed a so-called protection ring and are intimidating all the others. Too much time on their hands. I have been surprised and impressed with some of the inventions they have told me about. Our prison does not allow pens to be used yet the prisoners just laugh about it because they say it is much easier to do more damage with a pencil than it could ever be with a pen. I just take their word for it.

Cheryl and I started the day being lazy since it is a holiday. Hopefully today is the day we make a decision about a house. We meet with the realtor to take a second look at a house that is about an hours drive from here. We like it because it is in a small town, more relaxed atmosphere and yet still have access to three major towns for shopping. The part that concerns us is the closing costs and the lack on money on our part; hopefully we can borrow or negotiate it.

All I know for sure is that it puts me back in good old Idaho where the fishing is great, the laws are not that insane, yet, and the air is clean. When we moved from Bakersfield, CA the air was so bad that on a "clear" day you could see the brown haze lingering above any street you drove on. Coming off the Tehachapi hill you would just grit your teeth as you succumbed to the sea of filth. Ah, for the good old days of horse poop, saddles and bridles and good looking cowgirls. Naw, maybe not. Those girls weren't that good looking; no wonder the cowboys kissed their horses and let the girl get away.

I have always been a Louis L'Amour fan. As I would read his books I could envision myself riding to the rescue, getting in the fights (except I would probably lose), saving the town or the ranches and then riding off into the sunset on my horse. Of course there would be the lean, hardened trail look, the six gun on my hip, the hat that never comes off even in a fight, broad shoulders, narrow hips, just the image of masculinity. Instead what did I get; broad shoulders all right, sagging belly (no, not from drinking beer), my wife says I have the narrow hips that turn her on (maybe I should not have said that), I can't stand to wear cowboy hats or boots. I used to have the six gun but it got stolen so I said to heck with it. Anyone wanting rescuing is just in deep trouble if they are looking my way. :)

Okay that is enough for today. In case anyone did not catch the game Saturday the BRONCOS WON!!! Now they play the Pittsburg Steelers which means Denver will be in the Superbowl this year. GOOOOO BRONCOS!!

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Tiz Bronco Day Today!!

Today is the day that all America should be cheering for America's number 1 team, whether you like football or not.

I don't have much to say today since I took some medicine to help me sleep last night and my mind is still in a fog. A friend of mind sent me this from a lady in Austin, TX and I found it quite amusing.

Raising Boys

The following came from an anonymous mother in Austin, TX....Things I've learned from my boys (honest and not kidding):
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3. A 3-year-old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 lb boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 foot room.

5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When the ceiling fan is used as a bat, you must throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. Ceiling fans hit a baseball a long way.

6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late!

8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9. 80% of men who read this will try mixing Clorox with brake fluid.

10. A six-year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.

11. Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year-old boy.

12. Play Dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

13. Super Glue is f-o-r-e-v-e-r.

14. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool, you still can't walk on water.

15. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

16. VCRs do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

17. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

18. Marbles in gas tanks make a lot of noise when driving

19. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

20. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

21. The Fire Department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.

22. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

23. It does, however, make cats dizzy.

24. Cats throw-up twice their body weight when dizzy.

25. Those who pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without boys do it because:
a. For those with no children – this is totally hysterical!
b. For those who already have children past this age this is hilarious.
c. For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
d. For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.
e. For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Lost but Seldom Found

If there are any people from Colorado who read my blog I need your help. There is a lady (boy is that being generous) who has lost her way, her marbles and her mind. To the left is her portrait so if you see her it will not be hard to recognize her. Please be patient because she was abducted by aliens at an early age and we are still not sure what all they did to her. We do know she was stamped "rejected" and tossed out like an old rag and it had harsh emotional effects on her. Her name is Amber but she thinks she is a "Cootie Bug", whatever a "Cootie Bug" is but she will respond to just about anything. If you see her please do not approach her but call the "Who Cares" help line at 1-555-Who Cares. Thank you for your help.

This is a picture of our youngest son Michael, his wife Brandi, Derek on the left and Hayden on the right. They are a neat family and Mike is one of the FedEx managers in New Mexico. I keep forgetting to post their picture mainly because I had it in GIF format and blogger will not accept it so I changed it to JPEG.

Now back to ME, ME, ME.

When I was 12 or 13 years of age I lived for baseball. I would spend hours out behind the barn throwing a ball against an old car seat and I must admit I could throw pretty hard and fairly accurate. This particular year was the year we were going to take the valley championship, which for our team would be quite a feat, but, I have a sister who unfortunately had contracted polio and it left her one arm almost useless. The doctors determined that if she had a bone marrow transplant she might regain some use of the arm so they proceeded to find a bone marrow donor. Guess who was the lucky person? My baseball playing was cut short and since I would be starting high school that fall so was my football playing cut off.

We had the surgery and they took about 6 inches of my bone marrow and placed it in her arm. I cannot say it was a complete success but she has been able to use the arm more than she ever could before. She learned to play the guitar and is an accomplished singer; now if she just wasn't so darned onery.

Yes, yes I am a wonderful person to do such a thing. I pat myself on the back every now and again just to let me know what a great guy I am. I don't understand my wife though 'cause she just has a hard time appreciating me that much. Oh well, each morning I get up, look in the mirror and tell myself, "I am wonderful, I am so loving, I am so great the world should be happy to have me." Now there is a load full of Irish blarney!!

By the way ( and I am sorry I don't remember your name) thank you for spelling Auf whatever it was for me. I knew I would butcher it.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Just Getting By Today

As I have mentioned we are house hunting right now. Several of the homes we have looked at have fairly large yards which I am not too much in favor of. Mowing the lawn, pruning shrubs and doing all the other stuff cuts into my fishing time way too much. I told Cheryl we would have to get a riding lawn mower if we found a home with a large yard. She agreed that she would help if we had a riding lawn mower so I found the one above; do you think she will be happy?

As I have mentioned we do volunteer work at the prison here and we come across many different kinds of criminals. The one on the left was caught red pawed eating my food and that is a major felony. At the trial the judge found that there was an accomplise and sentenced them both 10-20 years living in our house doing hard sleeping and hard laziness. So far they have adjusted to it quite well.

We had to find prison dress for them though and this was the best we could come up with. Don't they look like a pair of viscious criminals of the feline kind? Actually these are pictures that someone sent to me but I thought they were kind of neat and had to make up a story to go along with them.

Now the monster on the left is the judge. He is actually our cat and has been with us for almost 16 years. We got him when he was a wee one and our dog picked him out of the litter. They were the best of friends up to the day we had to put our dog to sleep. We would tease the dog by telling him to go chase the cat. He would jump up, look around for a cat while all the time Gus (the cat) was standing next to him. It was like, "I don't see any cat. All I see is Gus." We love our animals but when Gus dies there will be no more for quite a while. It gets too hard leaving him behind when we go somewhere and and he does not like to travel.

Well, I am off to see the doctor about my plumbing. Fare Well, So Long, Auf Viedersein (or something spelled like that) to you. Good Byyyye, Good Byyyyeee, Gooood Byyyyyeeeee.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

When I Was Four (I Think)

I seen this picture and just had to show it for all you ladies out there who feel this way on a given morning.

Cheryl and I have been house hunting and are about wore out from it. We did find a lovely home that is in our price range, now if we can just follow through with all the other charges. The day will be coming when I will not be blogging for a while due to moving and re-establishing my Internet connection. I am lost without my computer. Through all the days of unemployment and sickness and whatever it has been my sanity saver. I did build a doll house that had all the neighborhood looking in on me to see how I was doing with it. Turned out pretty darned nice, especially for me. Maybe I will post a picture of it.

Another story about ME, ME, ME, ME!!! I like ME, I am so wonderful.

When I was around the age of four or five I was living with my soon to be adopted family. Down the road a piece was a large gravel pit that the county had used when building roads. Of course a gravel pit make for great sledding in the winter so my friends, Dan and Irvin, and I took off for the pit to have a lot of fun. Fun it was. We had to be careful though because some of the area was very steep and we could get hurt, but being that young who thought about that.

The sled I was using was the old Red Ryder, or was it Red Flyer, version. Wooden boards to lay on and metal runners that you guided by turning a stick or shifting your body. On my sled a couple of boards had been broken and there was a piece sticking out the back that came to a point. As I started down the hill my sled suddenly veered off to the side and down the very steep part I went. When I hit the bottom the pointed end of the sled rammed itself into my right leg near the hip joint and tore out a chunk of my leg about 4 - 5 inches long. How I missed the artery is still a mystery.

I was bleeding very badly and could not walk so Irvin loaded me on his sled and drug me home; about a quarter of a mile. My adopted parents thought I had wet my pants and became quite angry about it. They tried to get my shoes off but the pain was so bad I couldn't handle it. Finally Irvin got their attention and everyone realized that it was blood they were seeing not urine. Down to the doctor I went and they had to cut my boots off as well as my pants. To this day I don't know how he stopped the bleeding and fixed the wound. I do know I have a very large scar about 5 inches long and about 1/2 inch wide.

I guess Kip is not the only one who has accidents, I just don't have as many.

Someone mentioned in their blog that they ought to start writing about their life experiences. The main reason for my blog is to create my life history, be that as it may, for my children to read and save in their genealogy if they wish. A few years ago I started writing my history and got as far as when I met Cheryl, I think, but then I stopped. All of the kids have asked me to continue writing my story since they found it interesting. Mike looked at me one day when I was telling some stories and said, "Man, Dad, you have done some neat things in your life and had a lot of fun." Well I don't know about the neat things but I have had some fun, not all of it on the up and up though.

My wife says my blogs are too long winded so I will try to make them shorter if I can. How do you stop an Irishman from sharing the blarney?

This is the dollhouse I made.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Kip (Part 4)

When Kip was around 16 years old he was asked by his scout leader to go with him and do something; I don't remember what. As they were leaving our place they had to stop on a small bridge before entering the main hiway. As they were sitting there waiting for an oncoming car the other car suddenly swerved over and barreled into them. Reports said that the other driver was drunk. The car was totaled but Kip and his leader appeared to be all right. Kip kept complaining about his head and neck hurting so we decided to take him to the emergency room for a checkup.

Arriving at the emergency room we were all talking and he was telling us about the accident. The doctor came and looked him over and decided to take him back and have some x-rays taken. We waited and waited then the doctor came back and had a strange look on his face. Apparently in the performance of taking x-rays Kip fell into traumatic amnesia. He could not remember anything about the accident, he wondered why he was in the hospital and his whole personality changed in the twinkling of an eye.

He was brought out to where we were and he did not recognize any of us; this about devastated his mother. The kids were there and he asked who are these guys. He looked at me and I asked him if he recognized me and his answer was, "You must be Dad because you have an authoritative manner about you." He never used big words like authoritative!

We took him home and he was completely lost in the house. He did not know where the bathroom was, which room was his bedroom; nothing. The next day the kids were horsing around like they normally would and he asked his mother if those kids always acted that way. He was polite, well mannered, helped around the house (now that is a miracle) and most of all he wanted to read books like they were a new entity in his life. He never liked to read.

He went to school and all the kids kept asking what was wrong with him. He was too well mannered, he did not recognize his friends and the teachers were shocked that he was doing so much better. (Silver linings on dark clouds)

To make a long story shorter, we went through a LOT of therapy. It took a long time but his memory did come back although even today we notice some things that stuck with him. He still likes to read quite a bit. So needless to say that there were no scars on the outside this time but there are some emotional scars that have remained.

One last thing about Kip on this day. All through school he hardly ever passed a test. It would frustrate me to no end. When it came time for him to get his drivers license I did not worry about it because I knew he would not pass the written test. His driving was good (his dad taught him correctly) but the written; no way!! So one day he begged to go and take the written and I smirked all day long. I'll be doggoned but that brat passed his written and our cars were never safe from that day forward.

I will have other stories about Kip but this should do for a while. I have the story of when I took him hunting. AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Have a nice day everyone.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Ah old age!! It allows men to get away with so much and still be considered innocent.

Hope everyone had a nice weekend. Cheryl and I took a drive into the mountains and over to Bear Lake, Idaho looking at homes and just goofing off. We almost got caught by a snowstorm and me with no winter tires on the vehicle. Once we hit the top of the mountain pass we knew we had it made since it is all downhill to the city where we live. I must admit it was really doing some serious snowing though.

Reminds me of when Cheryl and I eloped. We were driving through Wyoming in an old 1959 Ford with no winter tires. We had traveled from Ohio through many states to Wyoming, through snowstorms and on icy roads without any problem. As we were approaching some small town in Wyoming the roads was very snow covered but without anyone giving us problems we knew we could make it. Wouldn't you know it. President Lyndon Johnson's two daughters were in a caravan on the same road and they had become stuck. Naturally we got stopped and when the car stopped we were stuck also. Lucky for us that once the Johnson party got going the state troopers were so relieved to get them out of their hair that they just gave us a push and left us alone. We made it without any further problems.

When I was driving truck a few years ago my co-driver and I had pulled out of Reno, Nevada and were heading to California using the back road that went to Ridgecrest. Both us were experienced snow drivers and as we kept going we noticed signs saying "chain up when roads are snow covered". We weren't experiencing any problems so we just kept going. Finally I looked at Earl and said, "Maybe we better pull over and put the chains on." We pulled over and when I stepped out of the truck I immediately fell on my keester. It was slick as snot, not that I go around testing to see how slick snot is.

We got the chains on and did not go 1/4 of a mile when who should be on the side of the road but good old CHP. He got on his radio and thanked us for chaining up. I got on my radio and asked if we could take them back off. "Oh yea", he said, "In about 100 miles." He was not lieing at all.

Tomorrow I will take on part 4 of the Kip saga. As I have thought about the things that kid has had happened I realized I can't tell all that. I would be writing for a long, long time.

We are now in the process of looking for a home. Kim and Robin decided to sell this house we are living in so it won't keep showing up on their credit report. Kind of caught us off guard but we will manage. We are finding that homes are darned expensive here. Might have to move to the Wyoming prairies and live in a tent.

Someone sent me these pictures and I thought they were funny. Hope this doesn't apply to any of my blonde friends out there.

Friday, January 06, 2006

Joseph Kip (Part 3)

Now this picture is what I call an interesting standoff. I bet Jason never seen anything like this.

Onward and upward with the Kip story.

We lived in Idaho Falls, Idaho for a few years and had a lot of fun there. Beautiful place but too commercialized now. Anyway when Kip was 12 years old we decided to go on an overnight camp trip with our camper. It was one of those trips where several friends were there with their campers and we were planning a dutch oven chicken cookout compete with dutch oven biscuits and cobbler. Yum, makes me hungry thinking about it.

Now Kip, as he was growing older, had developed a talent of making himself sick when he did not want to do something. He could actually make himself throw up and really fool us; at first. By the time he was 12 I was on to him and we went round and round about his faking illness.

He did not want to go camping, was pulling his usual tricks and I was not believing him at all so he went whether he wanted to or not. We arrived at the campground which was about 80 or 90 miles from Idaho Falls; beautiful place in the mountains. We set up camp while Kip and his brother Mike took off exploring and playing. We noticed them about 100 yards away climbing on a tree that had fallen over but had lodged itself in another tree. I never thought to question the safety of them playing, I was just glad they were having fun and not under my feet complaining about this or that. About dusk Mike came running over to us and said, "The tree fell on Kip." Now this tree was a good 8 to 10 inches in diameter so it was not a little one. We looked over and sure enough the tree had fallen but Kip was on the ground next to it.

I ran over there but he appeared to be okay. He was holding his stomach and groaning and when I asked him if he was okay he said yes. I just figured he had the wind knocked out of him so all would be all right. I took him back to the camper and he laid down. As it became closer for the time to eat dinner I was salivating about that dutch oven chicken and really looking forward to it. I asked Kip if he was ready for dinner and he said no, he did not feel good. I thought, another one of his tricks. I looked at him and made the comment that he was not going to ruin this trip by acting the way he was and I huffed off.

He stayed in the camper while the rest of us went and had dinner. His mother brought some food over to him but he would not eat it. After a little coaxing he finally tried some of the dutch oven potatoes; within 5 minutes he threw them up. Well fine, then he would not get any supper. Later we went to bed and he kept groaning and moaning and wanted to go home. Cheryl and I listened to this for a while and decided maybe I should take him to get checked out by a doctor. So I got up and Kip and I drove the 80 or so miles back to Idaho Falls and I took him to the emergency room.

The doctor on call could not find anything wrong but suggested Kip stay overnight so they could monitor him just to be sure. I went back to our house and spent the night, probably huffing about missing a good camp trip. The next morning I returned to the camp site, picked up my family and brought them all home. I found out later while I was gone the doctors were trying to make contact with me. Upon arriving home with the family we finally got the call and they wanted us back at the hospital as soon as possible.

Arriving at the hospital we found the doctors wanted to keep Kip longer for more observation. We visited with our son for a while then returned home to clean up and take care of the rest of the gang. We got a telephone call from the nurse saying that Kip was going into surgery and we should return right away. They were going to do exploratory surgery because they knew something was wrong but could not put their finger on it. When they opened him up they found a quart of blood had pooled in his abdomen and his spleen had ruptured. Had they not performed the surgery in all likelihood he would have died before the night was over.

Wellllllllll, again Dad had to do some soul searching about not listening to his children when they say something is wrong. The knees go a little weak when you find out it was so close. Having already lost a son I don't know how I would have handled another situation of like nature. I am just glad my wife was by my side giving me comfort and encouragement. Kip, now at the age of 12, has a scar down his back and a scar going like a reversed number 7 down his front. But the saga still continues; tomorrow the car accident.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Joseph Kip (Part 2)

Oh tis a sad day at the Delaney household. The mighty USC Trojans went down to defeat and were beaten by one man only. I had to borrow a crying towel from a Texan to dry my tears.

Joseph Kip is a loving person in spite of all his problems. When his little brother Pat was alive they played together constantly and it really had an effect on Kip when Pat died. I found out then that it is hard for a parent to explain to a 5 year old just what had happened. Thank goodness for the innocence of children and how they readily accept what we adults teach them.

I made a mistake on yesterday's blog. I was going to tell about the tree falling on him but Cheryl said my time line was not correct.

We moved to Ohio in the second year of our marriage, why I don't know, grass was greener I guess as well as my wander lust kicking in. We had some friends that liked to water ski and asked us to join them one day on Lake Erie for some water skiing fun. We were having a blast. The kids were all playing on the beach with one another and so we had a tendency to not pay as close attention as we should be. After a while I noticed Kip by himself playing with something and then he would put it in his mouth and chew on it. Curious I approached him and found he was chewing on a dead fish that had been lying there. All thoughts of food poisoning and other bad diseases popped into my mind. I yelled at Cheryl and we rushed off to the house to call the doctor.

The doctor instructed us to just put our finger down his mouth and make him regurgitate then watch him for a few hours but all should be well. Well, when we stuck our finger down his throat he bit it like he was having a steak banquet. The yelling started, the blood started and the frustration mounted; he did not throw up! Another call to the doctor. This time he said have him drink some milk. Got the milk and do you think that kid would drink it? No sir! That character usually liked milk but not this time, oh no.

Another call to the doctor. Have him swallow a raw egg. Okay, we can do that. Went and got the eggs and popped his mouth open; oh he swallowed it all right, he swallowed one and wanted another. He must of thought it was a real treat. By this time the yelling had subsided, the blood had stopped flowing but the frustration was still mounting. Called the doctor again and told him about the raw egg senario. His advice; put him to bed, watch him and all should be okay. He figured if the kid could survive all the attempts to make him throw up, plus liking a raw egg, he would be all right; the doctor was right.

I am sure there are more stories about this kid that I have forgotten. His mother can remember them all as any mother would. When he was 6 we lived in the small town of Riggins, Idaho. Our home was located about 10 - 15 miles out of town and on the banks of the Little Salmon River. Out back was a well house that covered the water pump. One day Kip and his sister Katie were out there playing on the roof of the well house when he slipped and slid off. Wouldn't you know it; a nail was protruding and as he slipped off he managed to tear the skin from his back. Now this was not a small tear, no sir, that kid would not be that kind to his parents. The tear went from shoulder to waist and he now bears a lovely scar across his back.

Tomorrow, unless Cheryl reminds me of another traumatic situation with Kip I will tell about the tree falling on him.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

My son, Joseph Kip

Yep, this is the one I have been threatening to tell the story of. He is the "tiny" one in the back taking up enough room for two children. That is his wife Audra next to him. Now there is a story in its own; we call her "Grizz" short for old grizzley. Doesn't that sound like there is a story there?

Oh, before I forget, the anniversary was great. King Kong was as good as we had been told, however, we had Papa Murphy's pizza (Cheryl's request) and I watched one of the best football games I have seen in many years between Penn St. and Florida St. (I know, I know not too many of you like football, sheesh)

Joseph Kip was born October 28, 1966 in Driggs, Idaho. Upon his arrival someone had to beat him to get him to breathe. When we all first seen him we started screaming and I started asking his mother questions about her whereabouts 9 months previous. The doctor even tried to return him back to where he came from but his mother would have none of that. Now, look at the picture above, who could resist such a smiling, chubby cheeked face like that?

Every family has the one child that is attracted to accidents, illnesses or whatever else could go wrong; Kip is our child. Sure Mike has broken his shoulder, Kim has cut her ear in half, Leslie has lost the tip of her finger from having a door shut on it, Katie has rammed a stick in her lip and made all the doctors laugh, but Kip, Kip has had it all.

I think it started when he was less than one year old. We lived in a tiny mobile home situated on a piece of property in the middle of nothing. In Teton Valley we would get some very severe thunder and lightening storms; this one night we had a doozy. Cheryl and I were in the back of the trailer and Kip was in his bed in the living room. The lightening was popping, the thunder was crashing so hard the trailer would actually rock. As we lay there we wondered how Kip was doing but being cowards, the both of us, we just hid under our bedsheets and waited. There was a horrible crash and we could tell the lightening had hit mighty close. We looked down the hall and could see electricity arching on the doors of the hallway closet. That was enough to make us get up and check on our baby.

I walked out into the living room area and it was fairly quiet. I thought with all the noise and electricity Kip would be crying and scared to death. Nope, not so. He was lying in his bed looking up at the ceiling and laughing. Stupid kid, didn't he know the situation was serious? Laughing I am telling you. We stood there in amazement and shook our heads. We knew then that this kid was veeeerrrryyyy different.

At the risk of making this too long for one blog I will stop here. I will say that he was a happy baby. He used to chase me in his walker and I would be on my motorcycle; we would go around and around the car just having fun. When he was about 5, I think, he fell out of a pickup while helping feed cattle and broke his arm; and so started a saga of accidents, injuries and all sorts of things that I will try and remember. Tomorrow, the tree falling on him.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Today is anniversary day

Yep, today is Cheryl and my 40th anniversary. Do I have any regrets? Nope, not a one. This gal is my best friend as well as all the other adjectives one could put with her name. True, life has had its share of ups and downs but we have remained true through it all. Someone once asked me what I would change in my marriage to Cheryl and I told them not a darned thing. It has been one of the best decisions in my life. The misgivings have been what I have caused. Sometimes my temper would get loose, sometimes my wander lust would get loose and sometimes the kids would get the best of me but overall I have a great family and an even greater wife. I look forward to spending eternity with her.

We met when I was visiting someone else in Ohio. I took one look at Cheryl and knew that this one was going to be my wife. I don't think I can produce a gratuity worthy of her.

What are we going to do today? Well for starters we are going to the movie King Kong. We both want to see it because we have heard such good comments. I have tried to convince her to take in a dinner as well but she does not want to do that. All these years we have celebrated at McDonalds and this year I was going to upgrade and take her to Burger King. For some reason she feels she can do a better job cooking at home. It is a win, win situation for me.

Did I get her anything for our anniversary? Well, I tried. I ordered a ring for her but it has not shown up; if it does I will save it for her birthday which is in March.

It has rained, rained and rained for the past few days. Luckily the mountains are getting a lot of snow which is a good place for it. We are beginning to grow webbed feet though. When I went to the doctor I started going quack, quack, quack. (I didn't really say that did I)

Tomorrow I promise to start the saga of one Joseph Kip Delaney. I have been threatening to do this for some time but there is so much to tell that I am afraid I will leave out some good parts. I'll get Cheryl to help me remember.

Remember, tomorrow is the big game. USC vs Texas. Now all you Texans might want to go and purchase crying towels 'cause you are going to need them; it will be a slaughter. :)