No picture today since I want to talk about something that has been bothering me lately. I think I am writing about it to help myself deal with the problem and not to burden readers with it. So if you don't want to read today's blog I completely understand.

Before I say what I want to I must mention to my good friend Foam that I just read your blog about your Mom. I have not had to deal with the Alzheimer problem and I hope I never do. I admire you for your thoughtfulness toward your Mom and the love you give her. You have my utmost respect. Now about those religious services. Hmmm, I hope you don't hold it against me because I am a fairly religious person in that I believe in God and His works but I don't believe in Bible thumping and finding fault with others for what they believe or do. I might not agree with others but when I become perfect then I can throw rocks. (Damn, better duck cause the Irish are quite perfect you know.):)) All I can say to your Mom is keep up the good work of heckling. She is my kind of gal.

A couple of weeks ago I received a call from my oldest son informing me that his only daughter was pregnant, still in high school and he was quite distraught. What do you say back. I gave him my sympathies and all the encouragement I could. I must say I am so disappointed in my granddaughter. Until she hit her teen years she was a good kid, respectful and sweet as the day is long. She had friends who uplifted her and they even made a pact to remain virgins until the day they married. Suddenly she started hanging out with a different crowd, no respect for her parents and siblings and her grades went from A's to F's. No matter what anyone would say they were wrong and she knew best. Now she is 18, single, pregnant and not a clue what life has in store for her. She has the attitude that Mom and Dad will be built in baby sitters while she continues playing with her friends. The one I feel the sorriest for is the yet to be born baby. That little one has done nothing wrong but is already starting life on two strikes. I asked my son if he even knew who the father is and he said he did. The father is now an inmate at one of the California prisons. What a legacy. I will be surprised if the baby grows up even knowing who the father really is.

I was six months old when my mother died. She was only 24 years old at the time and my brother was 3 years old. She was the second wife for my father and both of them died. His first wife was only 19 when she accidentally took the wrong medicine for migraine headaches. So here was a young father having lost not one but two wives at an early age. My brother and I were passed from relative to relative for a while. Finally one Aunt and Uncle, who had no children of their own, asked my father if I could live with them and they would raise me as their own.

They lived on the shores of Jackson Lake which is nestled up against the Teton mountains. Beautiful place, just the kind I always dream of. When I first arrived there I was close to death myself. My Aunt had to change my diapers with tweezers and carried me around on a soft pillow because my body could not handle anything harder. She nursed me back to health and I have pictures of her and I when she would take me fishing with her on the lake.

One day my father showed up unexpectedly, picked me up and told my aunt and uncle he was taking me to someone else. It about broke her heart and the closeness she had with me was broken that very day because she didn't want to be hurt that bad again. I was taken to another aunt and uncle who had told my father that they would raise me with the understanding that he was to never interfere, not to visit but once in a while, and I was to not have anything to do with my mother's family. They would adopt me and I would know them as the only family I had.

Needless to say this was not a loving situation. As much as I would like to remember many good times unfortunately I can only remember the frequent beatings, the harsh discipline, and the hatred toward my mother's family. I was not allowed to use the indoors bathroom except for taking a bath. If I had to relieve myself I was to go out to the barn and do it in the gutter where the cows stood. I learned to hate the woman with a passion.

I wanted to know my father so badly. I knew who he was, where he was (most of the time) but was not allowed to visit. To this day I know very little about my father and almost nothing about my mother. When my father would come for a visit on Thanksgiving day he would not talk to me.

Why do I mention this? I think of this new unborn baby coming into the world soon and wonder what kind of life it will have. Grandpa will be there but there is only so much Grandpa and Grandma are allowed to do. Will it even know it's parents? The mother is getting flakier by the day. So my heart goes out to this little one, the innocent one, the one who has no control on what is happening. What has happened to being responsible for out actions?

So to my friend Diana I say thank you for being a good daughter. Your mother needs you even if her mind is weakening and yet in her own way she is very grateful.

Sorry for sounding like I am feeling sorry for myself because I truly am not. I have learned to cope and move on. I have a GREAT wife who has helped me sooooooo much. She is my angel on earth. Now you know a little more about this Irishman.

Have a nice day everyone.