What Exactly Is A "Cootie Bug"

Here we have a version of a cootie bug. I have no idea what a cootie bug really is but I have found there are many versions of it. Is it dangerous? I don't know but I have heard that some species of cootie bug are very dangerous and should be approached with extreme caution.

This is another type of cootie bug that I found a picture of. Hidious creature to say the least. but wait... that's not all! On the right is still another type but I don't remember just exactly where in the world this particular one is found. I think someone went to Anarctica and came back with a bad case of cooties and this was the predominant one. (You'll have to excuse my spelling but just seeing these things gives me the heeby jeebies)

There are "4" types of cooties bugs and the last picture I will post is the most scariest, the most mind bogling discovery, the, well words just cannot describe it well enough. This particular cootie bug came from outer space. It was a first thought that it some how attached itself to the space shuttle but that theory has been disproven. Then it was thought that a meteor brought it to earth but scientist stated the entry into earth's atmosphere would have destroyed it. The only explanation that is plausible today is that it was abducted from earth, changed somehow into the state it is in now and then returned. The next picture shows the female version of a cootie bug and is known to have actually been seen in the state of Colorado somewhere in the Broomfield area. If you see this creature please approach with great caution. It is believed that it offers food, claiming to be a culinary specialist, but in reality it has doctored the food with little cooties and you will become infected. Now when you view this picture do not let your children see it for it can cause grave mental damage. Okay here goes....

Note the shifty eyes, the sharp teeth, the hands ready to pounce, the cheeks and smile as if to say, "I have you now." Most of all look at the headpiece. It is red from the blood of the last victim and this particular cootie attached the ears of its last victim to its hat for display like a trophy case. Scary indeed. Now it has been proven that this cootie did come from space. The mother ship abducted it when it was very small, rejected it for whatever reason and sent it back to earth to torment and terrorize the populace. This cootie will speak and claim it can play cribbage but do not believe it. It is a very terrible cribbage player.

Residents of Colorado please lock your doors, keep your children off the streets and if you spot this particular species run, run, run as if your life depended on it. Please do not encourage it to migrate to other areas of the country such as Utah. What did we do to you?

Oh, last but not least, this cootie bug will answer to the name of AMBER.