Today is the day that all America should be cheering for America's number 1 team, whether you like football or not.
"GO BRONCOS"
I don't have much to say today since I took some medicine to help me sleep last night and my mind is still in a fog. A friend of mind sent me this from a lady in Austin, TX and I found it quite amusing.
Raising Boys
The following came from an anonymous mother in Austin, TX....Things I've learned from my boys (honest and not kidding):
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 3-year-old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 lb boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 foot room.
5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When the ceiling fan is used as a bat, you must throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. Ceiling fans hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late!
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. 80% of men who read this will try mixing Clorox with brake fluid.
10. A six-year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.
11. Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year-old boy.
12. Play Dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
13. Super Glue is f-o-r-e-v-e-r.
14. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool, you still can't walk on water.
15. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
16. VCRs do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
17. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
18. Marbles in gas tanks make a lot of noise when driving
19. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
20. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
21. The Fire Department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.
22. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
23. It does, however, make cats dizzy.
24. Cats throw-up twice their body weight when dizzy.
25. Those who pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without boys do it because:
a. For those with no children – this is totally hysterical!
b. For those who already have children past this age this is hilarious.
c. For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
d. For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.
e. For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.
2 comments:
As you know I have three boys and the only reason I find it funny is because my boys have done basically NONE of those things:) I have known people, however, whose boys have! I guess I watch them too closely or something, but they seriously, as naughty as they can be, have never come close to any of those things.
I can imagine there are boys who exist who have, however. Like your son Kip, I have one who seems to always be in some kind of accident after another. I will try to find time to tell some of those stories on my blog soon. None of them are as serious as Kip's, but at the time, they are pretty upsetting:) It amazes us how he can manage to somehow hurt himself, some days numerous times!! Yet he is the athletic one, who can do anything he sets his mind to!
Enjoy your football:)
Say Tim ..When you read this did you go out and try the brakefluid and chlorox? How was your Dr's appointment.
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